Trick or Treat Jokes

Send your kids trick-or-treating with some new lines this year.

It is easy to get in the festive spirit with our collection of Halloween jokes.

  • Where do spiders go to learn new words? Web-ster's Dictionary
  • Who did Frankenstein take to the party? His ghoulfriend
  • Why did the school nurse send Dracula home? He had a coffin fit
  • Why couldn¿t the werewolf use his car? Somebody let the hair out of his tires
  • Where does Dracula keep his treasures? In the blood bank
  • Who was the ghost's favorite movie actor? Scarey Grant
  • What do ghosts eat for breakfast? Scream of Wheat
  • What is a ghost's favorite midway ride? The roller ghoster
  • Why is a ghost such a messy eater? Because he's always goblin
  • What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A sand-witch
  • What do you call two witches living together? Broom-mates
  • What kind of mistake did the ghost make? A boo-boo
  • What was the werewolf's favorite musical? "Hair"
  • Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts
  • What do birds hand out on Halloween? Tweets
  • What did the mother ghost tell her baby ghost at the dinner table? Quit goblin your food
  • Where do vampires live? In the Vampire State Building
  • How many witches does it take to change a light bulb? Only one -- but she changes it into a frog
  • How do you greet a three-headed monster? Hello, hello, hello
  • What do ghosts eat in Italy? Spookhetti
  • What did the mother ghost tell her children when they got into the car? Fasten your sheet-belts
  • Why are ghosts so popular? They raise everybody's spirits
  • What is Dracula's favorite breed of dog? Bloodhound
  • Why did Dracula go to the orthodontist? To improve his bite
  • Who was the ghost's favorite movie actress? Boo Derek
  • If Frankenstein's monster ran for President of the United States, why would he win? He would get all the volts
  • Chef: How do you like your eggs? Witch: Terrified
  • Where in Arizona does Dracula go for a vacation? Tombstone
  • How do you get into a locked cemetery? With a skeleton key
  • Why do witches wear name tags? So they would know which witch is witch
  • Why do witches fly on brooms? Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy
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